Gentle and quiet? Who me?

In my daily devotions, I've been studying the book of 1 Peter - which lately has included slogging through Tyndale New Testament Commentary by Wayne Grudem.  While some of it is just a load of "Greek"...haaaa pun intended....there are some really great insights as well.

This morning I got to study 1 Peter 3  - aptly titled Wives and Husbands.  How fitting that I am a wife! With a husband! I tell ya, this passage has ruffled more than a few feathers in its day but it's one that I cherish and I was so excited to see what Mr. Grudem had uncovered.

Let's revisit the first few verses of 1Peter 3:

Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior or their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 1 Peter 3: 1-4

I don't want to hit on the submissive bomb too much.....maybe that's for another post.  Mr. Grudem had some great things to say about that too.   But anyway.....

What I want to touch on is the last two verses regarding the beauty of a woman.  It's often hard to just be a woman in today's society.  Media and Hollywood constantly impress on us the "ideal" image. As wives we feel "judged" by our ability to keep house, raise children (for those who are blessed in that way) or be that perfect loving wife. Perfect. Ick.

Unfortunately when we internalize these ideals, we often project them on to the people we love the most - our spouse, our children, our family. It's really hard to be perfect when the rest of the crew isn't keeping up, eh?

Some people say that the Bible doesn't translate into today's age....but I disagree! I think these verses hit the nail on the head. 

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment" - I don't believe that Peter is suggesting that we dress like slobs, wear our hair in a way OTHER than braids or go without jewelry. He is saying that our value and worth are not from outward adornment.  We've all met a woman that is beautiful to look at but has an ugly character, right?

"Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit..."(vs 4)

According to the Tyndale New Testament Commentary, the adjective "gentle" (praus in Greek) is defined as:

- not insistant on one's own rights
- not pushy
-not selfishly assertive
-not demanding one's own way

(I don't actually need to say anything about that list, do I?.....Didn't think so )

Mr. Grudem goes on to say, " Such a spirit is the result of a quiet and continual trust in God to supply one's needs."

That's all it is ladies.  When we are looking to someone (or something) other than God to meet our needs.....they won't! They can't!  Our poor husbands are not able to meet our EVERY NEED ladies. They're human and sinners saved by grace.  But if we choose, every day, to cast our cares on our Creator and let Him fill us up (like only He can) then our hubbies are free to be who God made them to be.

I betcha if we stop putting so much pressure on our husbands to be who "we" want them to be, they'd be more inclined to try.   Get it?

And I betcha when God fills in all the gaps, you'll find your husband meets more of your needs than you realized :)

I'm pretty bad at this....for the record. "Quite" and "gentle" are hardly in my vocabulary. But I've seen the changes in MY life, when I stopped looking to my husband and I started looking to God. And it's funny, I'm starting to see the changes in my hubby too. God works in wonderful, sneaky ways. Who knew?!

Courtney over at Women Living Well wrote two great posts about dealing with p*rnography in marriage and cited a number of really great resources. Maybe one day soon I'll share our story about how God is making a dirty, jaded mess into something beautiful ....I know He is....I can feel it.



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Beautiful on the inside :)

Edit: I'm linkin this post up to Courtney's Women Living Well Wednesday

Forgiveness and Unresolved Hurt

Hubs and I are doing a 7 week marriage course called.....The Marriage Course ...go figure. The difference between this and other seminars is that each couple sits at their own little table so you can discuss each topic and questionairre in privacy.  Three cheers for not having to air the dirty laundry! Oh and we also get coffee and dessert EACH WEEK!

This course is specifically designed to get you and your spouse talking about some things that you may have never talked about. Heck, we thought we wouldn't have much to say.....turns out we were wrong! Communication is a beautiful thing.

Last nights' segment was on The Power of Forgiveness and identify unresolved hurt. My love and I found it especially...helpful?...so I'd like to share with you some exercises to help open the lines of communication.

Have you ever stopped to think about how past hurts are coloring your relationship today? You may not even realize just how much an unresolved hurt influences the way you deal with conflict in your day-to-day life.  It's possible that it may even stem from a previous relationsip.

Do you have a quick temper? Impatient or intolerant? Have you found yourself escaping to work or other activities rather than spending time with your spouse? Is your sleep disturbed? Is your sex drive low? Do you feel like a robot, just going through the motions?

These are all possible symptoms of unresolved hurt in our relationships, and there are many more.

The first step is to IDENTIFY those hurts. Take some time to sit down with your spouse, grab a coffee and two notebooks....and some tissues. 

1. try to identify ways you may have hurt your partner.  Be honest with yourself and take care not to make excuses or point blame.
2. now list ways that your partner has hurt you. It may be recent or it may be something that happened a long time ago. Think back to your dating relationship even.  It may be one incident or something that occurs over and over again. Again, be honest with yourself and identify the feelings associated with the hurt. Use "I" sentences.
3. when you are finished, exchange lists and read how your spouse feels he/she has hurt you and the ways you have hurt your spouse.
4. take turns "clarifying" each others hurts. Ask for more detail and really try to understand your partner. Do not try and interpret what they have written or try and defend yourself.

Step two is to APOLOGIZE.  It is so important for us to take responsibility for our transgressions against our spouse....even if we still don't quite understand why.  When we confess to God and receive forgiveness from Him, He enables us to see the effects of our actions.

"Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed." Philippians 3:13

Step three is FORGIVE.

 Forgiveness is a choice. Not a feeling. It is not demanding a change before forgiving someone. It is not pretending it doesn't matter. It is not thinking that time alone will heal the hurt.  It won't.  You have to CHOOSE to forgive. You may have to forgive someone many times - even for the same thing.  It is a process.

"Peter came to Jesus and asked, 'Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me?  Up to seven times?' Jesus answered, 'I tell you, not seven times but seventy-seven times seven.'"  Matthew 18:21-22

                 

    Something that really struck me was that "forgiveness is releasing the other person into God's hands, leaving the consequences to Him."  If we continue to hold the transgression in our hearts, we are the ones that will be ensnared by resentment and bitterness.  We have been forgiven by God therefore we must forgive one another.

"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger.....Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32

My love realized that he hadn't forgiven me for my past. I realized that I react to my love's advances negatively in part because of experiences I had in a previous relationship. It was a tearful night.  You might be surprised at what comes bubbling up from the depths.

I challenge you to work through this exercise with your partner...even if you think there couldn't possibly be anything to talk about. Take time together. Pray together. Forgive together. Grow together.





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Christmas Recap

I know, I know...it's almost a week into January already.  In my defense, we had "Christmas" with my family on New Years Day so I'm still in recovery mode from the holidays.

After three months of negotiating - THREE MONTHS - we managed to decide on spending 5 days at my hubby's parents place for Christmas and then have my parents and brother/wife come to our house for "Christmas" over New Years.

Holiday negotiating involves multiple phone calls between me, my parents, and my brother.....and occasionally the other two families we call in-laws. Let me clarify that hubs and I had everything alllllll figured out 'til my brother went and got married last year.  Somehow things are much more complicated now. Lord willing, we'll be able to settle into some sort of "holiday schedule" SOON!

Ok that said, our Christmas holidays went really well.  We spent 5 days in beautiful Grand Forks, BC.  Not North Dakota. B.C. Hubs and I both grew up there so it's always nice to go home and see some old faces and places.  We did some ice fishing, and snowboarding and watching movies in front of the fire.

This is how I ice fish..... Sometimes I sit down..but then I fall asleep. So standing is better.

Santa was good to me this year: 

All I need now is #16 on the back of this baby and I'm set! (That's Trevor Linden for the record)



A lot of women complain that their husbands never buy them anything good - NOT ME! My hubby always knows just what to get me! I have been wanting a Canucks jersey forever!

After a few days rest ..HA...by rest I mean frantically cleaning my house...my parents and brother/wife came on the 30th. AND IT WENT WELL! Praise the Lord, there is hope for us. 

We had so much fun playing pond hockey and games that make you do silly things. 

Santa made a second trip just for us and brought us AND my brother and wife:



Read it and weep ladies. I am the proud new owner of this beautiful new KitchenAid Mixer!

And, even though by some strange freak of nature, we had NO snow in town for Christmas, it was still full of fun and family. Plus, you can always find snow up here when you need to :)

Make it Happen Monday

Ammie at Domestically Obsessed, is taking the week off to spend with her family so I won't be linking up my to-do list this week.  I have lots to prepare for though so I need to make a list anyway!

• buy primer for our basement (woooo the drywall is finally done!)
• vacuum....twice.
• wipe the drywall dust off of EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
• LAUNDRY
• arrange the furniture to make an inviting second guest room out of our junk room ..eek.
• revamp menu-plan and grocery list to adapt to sister-in-law's candida diet
• clean up laundry area/storage room
• get  groceries for our New Years Christmas with my family
• chop kindling...and then clean the carport...again.
• make the pillow covers that have been on my to-do list for the last month! They will be the perfect finishing touch for our guest room.

 If you haven't already seen it, I'd like to suggest a new movie for your Christmas traditions.  The Nativity Story is a movie about exactly that. It's not a story about the life of Jesus, just the events leading up to His birth and the exodus to Egypt to escape Herod. If you're a sceptic of "religious" movies (and you have a right to be) this is not your typical low-budget, bad acting movie.  It brings to life the story that we so easily glaze over year after year. How many times have I watched the kids Christmas rendition play through my mind as I listened to the story? Not once have I really stopped to fully grasp the scorn that Mary and Joseph endured from their friends and neighbours. It brought me to tears.  This story is not a "story".  It's not about little children dressed in sheets, fumbling through script lines. It's about a girl. Not a grown women. A girl with more faith than any of us will ever have. A girl who could have been stoned to death and yet chose to believe in her Lord and Saviour. It's about a man who was put in the most painful situation - expose his fiancee and watch her be stoned, quietly anull the engagement to the woman he loves OR trust in his Lord and take her as his wife anyway. How many of us could show so much integrity and faith if faced with the same circumstances? I don't know if I could. I guess that's why He chose Mary and Joseph. Not Tim and Camille.

Watch it and remember the amazing events leading up to the birth of our King - a baby. Remember that it's not a story.

Christmas holidays

Well folks, it's gonna get a little slow around here for the next couple weeks.  I had some posts planned around projects I want to do - except now we're a week before Christmas and I have no idea when I'm going to get those projects done.  They'll just have to wait for the New Year.  Until then, my posts will be few and far between as we spend time with friends and family.

The thought I wanted to share today is a follow up to my revelation on Tuesday.  I think it's safe to say that for the majority of women out there, Christmas is a time of high stress levels, anxiety and the like. I am right there with you.  It seems like all year I look forward to spending time with family, but when the time actually comes for us to visit (or them to come here)  I am tired, stressed out and worrying about how things look and who will start the arguement this year.  How easy it is to forget about the real reason for Christmas.

I've just started a book study called Experiencing God.  It is challenging how I believe God speaks to me and how I discern His will for my life.  It has only been a week and I have a feeling this is going to change my life.

Anyway, I've been realizing that when I worry about things and allow them to consume me, I am essentially saying that I don't trust God. I am saying that God is not big enough to handle my problems, His strength is not enough for me.  How horrified I was! You have no idea how many minutes/hours/days I spend stressing about this and that - stupid little things that mean nothing in the long run.

In the same breath, how many times have I worried about God using me for his work? How many times have I answered back, "No Lord, choose someone else.  I'm not good enough. I don't speak well enough.  Why would they listen to me?"

I read a profound statement this morning:

When you believe nothing significant can happen through you, you have said more about your belief in God than you have declared about yourself.

Yikes.

God cares for us.  He longs to be in the closest most intimate relationship with each one of us. Don't let your doubts and pride get in the way!  He longs to use you in ways that you can never imagine. 

So in this Christmas season, I challenge you to spend it one day at a time. Take a deep breath and remember that God carries you in the palm of his hand.  He will make sure that tomorrow takes care of itself, if only you let go.  Chances are, if you're worried about things being perfect, you've forgotten the true meaning of Christmas after all.  And in the midst of the chaos, don't forget to spend time with Him and ask Him to join you in the celebration!

I wish you a very blessed and merry Christmas!

This Week's To-Do list

I got a pretty obvious message from God in my morning devotions in the form of Matthew 6:33-34. It goes something like this:

"Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Heard. Understood. Acknowledged. Doesn't get much clearer than that! Isn't cool how He brings things into perspective when everything seems to be spiralling out of control? If I follow Jesus one day at a time, I will be right at the center of God's will every step of the way. Gotta get my priorities straightened out!

Alright, so last week wasn't a complete failure...but I certainly didn't get as much done as I was hoping. I don't know about you, but it seems the more I get stressed about the length of my to-do list...I get less and less done.  It's unreal. 

Last night I sat down and made a list, which unfortunately involves some things from last week but I've already managed to cross a bunch off this morning so I'm on a roll!  Here she is:

- finish meal plan for Christmas (on New Years) with my family
    ***waiting to hear back from my brother how long they will be staying 'til I can finish this one**

- clean the fireplace brick - this is really not necessary but it's on my list anyway

- clean toothbrush holder.....it was gross...and I just know a certain someone who would notice

- vacuum crumbs from cutlery tray...also gross

- wipe out fridge

- wrap presents...this is possibly the EARLIEST I have ever crossed this off my list!

- make guest bed

- mop kitchen - waiting for hubby to wake up so I can vacuum it first

- cut kindling and clean up carport (I'm secretly hoping hubby will see this on my list and do it for me :) Here's hoping!

If all these things get done then I'm hoping to start on some fancy pillow covers for my guest room and living room.  I was hoping to have these done eons ago but I have come to terms with the fact that this REALLY isn't a priority.

EDIT: Look at all the black lines up there! I am so proud of myself - I got so much done today. I might need to make a whole new list to start tomorrow!

What's on your list this week?

Make It Happen Monday (night)

Oki doki - Christmas is just around the corner, can you believe it? I'm way past that though. I'm already stressing about New Years.

Wanna know why?

My family is coming.

HERE.

Last time that happened was a year and a half ago.....and it didn't end well. Enough said.

My list of things to do this week involves starting to get ready for them to come. Basically, cleaning, cleaning and MORE CLEANING.  My house is never clean enough for my mom.

Ok now that I've got that off my chest I can get on with my list!

• wash guest room bedding and make the bed (somehow this part never gets done)
•  buy a million drapes and decide on a set for said guest room
•  finish sewing decorative pillow covers for said guest room ( hoping to do a post on this project!)
• VACUUM
• mop the kitchen
• make 8 dozen cookies for the baking swap next Monday - that number is daunting...I may need to enlist the hubby
• work on my harmony part for the kids Christmas production (I'm part of the adult choir)
•  hopefully make a batch of biscotti to wrap up as Christmas gifts for the families of my piano students

EDIT: Well, I've gotten so much done this week....but hardly any of it was on my list!  The bedding is washed...the bed is not made though and I'm hoping to tackle the middle three today.  My baking swap will have to wait 'til tomorrow!

Yikes, somehow I feel like I've bitten off more than I can chew.  Some of the cleaning can wait but we're leaving for Christmas with my hubby's family on the 22nd so my time is starting to run short! And we don't even have our Christmas tree up!

What's on your list this week?

Make it Happen Monday

I'm switchin it up from the usual Menu-plan Monday this week.  I'm feeling like I need the incentive to actually accomplish something this week.  I spent all of last week recouperating from our holiday in Mexico.  Isn't it strange how you almost need a holiday from the holiday?  I was so exhausted all week!

Anyway, on to the good stuff.  Havin a get'er done day with Ammie at Domestically Obsessed!

For Today:

• make bread and buns
• make coffee plans with two girls from our youth group and a lovely lady that I just want to sit and learn from! She doesn't understand why I want to spend time with an "old fart" like her!
• put up a few more Christmas decorations

This afternoon I'm booked from 3:30 - 9 with two piano lessons, dinner with good friends and then bible study!

For the Week:

• sew table covers for my bedside tables
• create some Christmas artwork that I saw on CityLine
• stuff rags in all the registers on our main floor to keep the cold air from the basement in the basement
• buy wedding present for a wedding on Saturday!
• buy baby shower present for shower on Tuesday
• make appy's for said baby shower
• plan meals and baking for our family Christmas (we're celebrating over New Years since we're spending Christmas day with my husbands family)
• bake muffins for our youth coffee cart ministry
• find some tougher Christmas piano music for one of my students

I'm sure there's more but that's a pretty good start!

I'm just angry ok?

                          

I've been in this funk the last couple days - for the longest time I couldn't figure out why.  Last night we watched Brian Doerksen's Level Ground video with our bible study and for some reason, which I can only deem completely unrelated to the video, I realized that I'm just angry.  That's all.  I'm angry.

I'm mad at my hubby. I'm mad that he is susceptible to temptation.  I'm mad that he's not strong enough to overcome his weaknesses (even though he's come a long way). I'm mad that he forgets that I hurt so much deeper than he can imagine.

I'm mad at those people we've confided in and looked to for guidance.  The ones that are, dare I say, obligated, to reach out to us, for support and accountability. I'm mad that they haven't been there for us.

I'm mad because I feel like I have no one to support me.  Who wants to hear about these things? It's dirty, taboo laundry in Christian circles.  No one wants to ask about things like this, can I blame them for not asking?

I'm mad at God. I've never had the guts to express that before but there.  I'm mad at God.  I'm mad that I don't feel strong. I need His strength but I don't feel strong. 

And mostly I'm mad at myself.  I'm mad that I let this get between me and God. I'm mad that I haven't been the prayer warrior for my hubby that he needs me to be. I'm mad that I can't be there for him when he needs me.  I'm mad that I can't meet his deepest need without feeling used and dirty.  I'm mad that after all this time I still feel like nothing has changed. When will it get better? Will it ever feel better?

Oh and I'm mad at my mom too, but for completely unrelated reasons.

Back to Reality: My Monday Daybook

Outside my Window...It's a chilly October day. Windy and gray with a tornado of yellows and oranges as the leaves swirl off the trees in my front yard.  I love those trees....but not raking....

I am Thinking...  Man, I so don't want to clean my house this morning.  After spending 5 days living out of a camper in the middle of God's beautiful creation with good friends, it pains me to come back to the hustle and bustle of real life.

Our home for a week. Nothin to worry about except cooking simple meals and occasionally sweeping the camper floor....but only when I really feel like it!

I am Thankful for... My wonderful husband who diligently goes to work each day to "win the bread" and for the security in his job (for now).

From the Kitchen... Nothing yet, but there will be a big pot of Mennonite Borscht bubbling on my stove today or tomorrow! I have a cabbage that needs to be used and what better than a warm, hearty soup. I re-found the Mennonite Girls Can Cook blog and spent some time pouring over the recipes that my Grandma makes.  Since we won't be spending Christmas with the extended family this year I think I'm going to have to try some myself!  I will post the recipe for my Mom's borscht tomorrow...I can't find her recipe and the ones on the MGCC blog don't have the spices that gives my Mom's the flavor I love!

I am Wearing... Jeans, a warm, nubby sweater and my slippers.  I have to change into dressier clothes for my piano lessons this afternoon but I'd rather be comfy while I'm doing my housecleaning!

I am Creating... a quilt! Ok, I haven't actually started yet...oops...but it's my October project for the 12 New Things adventure I've embarked on with Sarah Mae over at Like a Warm Cup of Coffee.  I might not get it finished in time but I have really good intentions on starting.  Projects like that require one to actually be at home for more than a handful of days out of the month!  Has anyone else quilted before? I could use some helpful hints!

I am Going... to the Mayan Riviera (Mexico) in less than two weeks with my hubby and our really good friends! Somehow I still don't feel old enough to be going on major trips like this without my parents...is that strange?! :)  We travelled a lot as a family...usually by car and tenting along the way and I have such great memories from it.  I just hope that we can give our children the same experiences.

I am Reading... Boris Pasternak's Doctor Zhivago.  It has taken me almost a month...which is ridiculous because I usually read books in a week or less.  I found a list of 1001 Books to Read Before You Die and I figured I should try some of the classics.  It's definitely not my usual style but I'm slowly getting drawn into the story line and the drama.

I am Hearing... the dishwasher in the kitchen and the fire crackling in the fireplace - the latter is by far one of my favorite sounds of all time.

Around the House... shows signs of the tornado that was me as I prepared and packed for our hunting trip last Wednesday.  My dearest was at work so I had to do everything myself amongst everything else in my schedule....it's a disaster.  I am using one of FlyLady's key skills - I set my timer for 15 minutes to clean, and then I come back and work on this post for 15 minutes.  It keeps me from getting overwhelmed!

One of my Favorite Things... curling up on the couch by the fire with a hot cup of coffee and a good book. 

A Few Plans for the Week... this is actually the first week in October that we will be home for the entire week. Yes, it has been a crazy month.  I have piano lessons to teach today, tomorrow and Wednesday, worship team practice on Thursday evening (I play keyboard at church two Sunday's of the month), we help out with our church youth group Friday nights..ummm what else.  Tonight is Date Night with our Young Married's bible study.  We do a potluck dinner and just hang out and enjoy each other's company.  Oh! And Wednesday night we kick off our Coffee Cart ministry with the Youth group! We've been donated all the coffee we need from Van Houtte and a big gazebo from Canadian Tire...so cool! We're setting up right here on the North Shore in Kamloops - we want to reach the people right here in our area...here's praying for some good witnessing opportunities!

Some Pictures I'm Sharing...

The best way to relax - sitting around the campfire with a good book, a warm cup of coffee and my leopard print slippers!

One of the many waterfalls in Wells Gray National Park - if you've never been to beautiful British Columbia you're missing out!

I know it's a bad picture but this is one of our youth getting baptized in the freezing cold river! Woooooo! These are the moments that make hanging out with 30 screaming teenagers every Friday night bearable.



The Simple Woman's Daybook is a journal outline for women to take a moment out of our busy day to focus on the simple, beautiful things we're blessed with in everyday living.

The Crazy Cycle

You know that moment when you're standing toe to toe with your dearest - he is being so unloving and refuses to hear you out - and all you want to do is wrap both hands around his scrawny neck and squeeeeeeeeeeeeze?  But instead of squeezing, you repeat all the reasons you're right, over and over and over and over again, with as many different wordings that you can come up with.

And where do you get?        NOWHERE

 My friend, I'd like to inform you that in that moment, you are on the Crazy Cycle.

We've been watching a series of video's with our Young Married's bible study by Emerson Eggerichs called the Love and Respect Conference.  And man is it good.  It's one of those, slap ya in the face, spin ya around and make you look at everything from a completely different perspective.......your husband's. Who knew.

The Crazy Cycle is negative emotions feeding negative emotions.  Men thrive on respect.  This should not be a surprise.  And women, we thrive on love.  But when a man acts unloving toward his wife, how does she often react? DISRESPECTFUL.  And when a man feels disrespected by his wife, how does he act? UNLOVING.  Do you see the Crazy Cycle?! It's easy to see, but so much harder to get off! Here's a perfect example.

We watched the last session tonight and what really hit me was this:

The real relationship is between us, as individuals, and our Lord.  And for a small fraction of eternity, our spouse passes between us and God.  For that short time, my reverance to God will spill over to my husband. The example Emerson uses is to imagine God standing behind your spouse, saying "Don't worry about Joe, focus on Me. Show reverence to Me.  Let Joe go, love and respect Me." When we are focussed on being one with Christ, he will give us the strength to love our spouse for who God made them to be, thick skull and all.

This Conference opened my eyes to so many things.  It is an amazing video series. Emerson is sooo sooooo easy to listen to...and really funny! I totally recommend it for watching with a close-knit small group.  It's for young-married's like us and for old-marrieds too! Please take a minute and look into it. Read some his articles.  You won't regret it.

Who I am

Donna at Funky Junk Interiors is having an All About Me party so we can get to know each other! That's where I'm linkin up!

My name is Camille and I'm a stay-at-home....wife! Yup, that's right...not mom....wife. No kids...yet. I am 25, have Bachelor of Science degree but after 2 years of working full time we decided that our marriage was more important than being well-off so I quit!  And I haven't looked back since.

I am married to a wonderful man who NOBODY expected me to marry. He hunts, he fishes, he works on cars, he tries to talk me into decorating our house in cowboy paintings and various antlers....and I love him (but not the cowboy paintings...)  I am his help meet and his biggest fan.  This means I am the one sitting at the front of the boat with rod in hand (and a book in the other),  I am the one following silently behind him as we creep through the bushes (....taking pictures of flowers), and I am the one on the ground beside him ready to pass him the necessary tools under the car.  No, I don't always enjoy it, but nothing thrills me more than hearing my husband say that he would rather do these things with ME....not his friends. 

Jesus Christ is my Lord and Saviour.  He is my rock and my fortress. I would not be the person I am today with Him and I don't believe I would be still married if it weren't for God carrying me through.

I am a piano teacher. Sometimes I love'em. Sometimes I want to wring their little necks (not literally I promise).  But when the year is over I miss my kids sooooo much.

Where I Live

Kamloops, BC. Canada's desert. 40 degree summers (that's 100 for you american folk). Love it.  It fills my need for small-town community but I can go shopping if I need to without leaving town! (It's still a novelty)

We love it because you can fish a different lake every week for a year and in less than 15 minutes you can be lost in the great outdoors.

...or stuck in the great outdoors.

We moved here 3 years ago, never having been here before except for 3 days to find a place to rent. We knew no one and spent 3 weeks holed up in our basement suite playing video games 'cause we didn't know anyone.  I don't play video games.

What I Love About My Home

I love that it's ours. No more renting. No more roomates. No more landlords stomping around upstairs. No more dark, dank basement suites.  It's not perfect.  Actually, it's far from that (it's tourquoise).  But with every painted wall, it becomes more and more the home we dream of.

My Favorite Room

Is ...well...our bedroom?  It's the most finished room and the one that I dream about changing the least....
Most of all, it's the place where Tim and I can reconnect after a long day....even if it's just spending time in silence with my head on his wonderfully broad chest.

My Favorite Thing to DIY

I'm new to DIY, but gosh in the last few weeks I sure caught the spray paint bug.  How awesome is that!?  We have very little furniture to put in our new house so I am on the hunt for thrift store finds to fix up!

I Wish I Knew How To

Build things! And I will learn, don't you worry.  I just have to get brave enough.  I also wish I could decorate...haha. Some people have an knack for it...and some people don't. But that won't stop me from trying!

Something You May Not Know About Me

I secretly want to be a model when I grow up....

Why I Love to Blog

I'm pretty new to this whole bloggy world but what a fun way to get to know people and share ideas! I just had to be a part of it.  That and I REALLY need help decorating our house.....

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

This morning I was reading Sarah Mae's series Marriage Is Hard.  I have been feeling really convicted lately about how I treat my husband and this was just what I needed to urge me back on track. 

I'm not going to go into details or anything but our first few years have been difficult - things have happened that have decimated my trust in him and unfortunately my respect for him as well.  I often get angry when I read articles about how a Godly wife shows respect for her husband even if he doesn't deserve it.  That's all fine and dandy but I feel like I'm so far past that.  I tried. I swear I did. But it seemed like every time I chose to believe his best intentions and trust him - I got stabbed in the back.  So I gave up.  I closed my heart. I built a strong brick wall around my heart.  I don't believe in divorce so he will have to just live with a robot for the rest of his life because that's all the emotion he would get out of me. 

I'm not healed.  We've seen a counsellor...or three.  And things are different now - supposedly. I wish I could tell you that I believed him but the only thing that I can trust is that time will tell.

In part 3 of Sarah Mae's Marriage is Hard series, she shared an excerpt from Living Ephesians 5: Wives, Respect your Husband (written by Nancy Anderson) and it really struck home with me. I encourage everyone to grab some tea and read the whole article.

The part that really got me was the paragraph on respecting my husband in intellect.   My husband is by no means a dunce...do not get me wrong...we just have had different life experiences.  Anyway, last week after a small arguement over money, he admitted that he often feels like I know everything and he knows nothing.  Yikes. And that even if he knows I'm right, he feels like he needs to assert himself.  You can imagine how that has been going for us.

Nancy suggests that instead of telling him that he's wrong, or throwing a fit, I should cater to his ability to fix things and solve problems.  If he wants to buy something that is not within our budget, instead of nagging and telling him he's making a horrible decision, I should bring him our budget and ask him to help me change things so we can afford it.  That way, if we really can't, he will see it for himself.

When we're arguing about something that we can't agree on, instead of me pushing my opinion over and over until he caves, I am going to try Nancy's advice by asking him, "Is that your final decision or can I try and convince you?"  And then, if he says no, then I am going to leave it alone and trust his judgement.
 It's hard to let things go, especially when I know I'm right - but I have a feeling that this will change our marriage. 

I challenge you ladies to read Sarah Mae's series Marriage is Hard and the article Living Ephesians 5: Wives, Respect your Husbands.  Spend some time in quiet and let me know what God is speaking into your heart!

12 New (ish) Things

I often venture over to Like a Warm Cup of Coffee and this month Sarah Mae is challenging herself and us to learn/do twelve new things - one per month.  How cool is that?  Check out her list and check out mine too! I'm gonna make September my first month since I'm starting a little late!

September

Goodwill transformation! I am always green with envy at the things some ladies find and transform SOOOOO - my hubby found a little side table someone was giving away for FREE so I am going to give it a make-over!
COMPLETED - check it out!

October

I stole this from Sarah Mae and a few others but I too, want to learn to quilt!

What better to make on a chilly fall day!

November

Maybe this belongs in December too, but this year I want to send out Christmas cards with pictures and letters to update all our friends and family! I figure I'd better start in November!

December

Make homemade gifts for friends and family. 

 I'm going to try making spice and baking mixes!

January

Learn to make candles! My favorite scent is pumpkin spice.

February

Actually register for an online course in Medical Transcription....eeeeek!

March

Take the time to research and plan the layout of my flower beds.  I want plants that are easy to care for and are drought-tolerant for our desert climate.

April

Start my garden inside so the little guys are ready to transplant in May!

May

Plant my first REAL garden! No more pots for me, yo!

June

ummmm, ok I got pretty far.  Summer is a hard one for us 'cause we're usually gone more than we're home.  I'll tell you a secret though.  Lord willing, by this time next year my summer "new things" will include reno'ing our spare room for.....a nursery!